Nouslife: Posada blog chain for Advent.

Nouslife: Posada blog chain for Advent.

I think this is a wonderful idea! I sat here at my computer practically rubbing my hands with glee, thinking, "Oh, I want to participate in this!"

Do you want to participate, too? I think it would be such a cool thing!

Day Job!

For those who read about my latest job-hunting challenge, here's an update.

I begin a 3-4 month assignment tomorrow that, if successful, could morph into a permanent position after that time. Right now it involves taming a big backlog. I'll be creating and updating electronic patient records for a local nephrology practice, with a little front-desk cross-coverage. The pay rate isn't wonderful, but it's more hours than I had at my previous day job. More than I want, really, but I do need the money. And rarity of rarities, I didn't even have to interview for it; they selected me on the strength of my resume, which my agency recruiter hand-carried and presented last Friday. (You'd be amazed at how there can be a series of interviews even for 1-2 month assignments. Almost no one just accepts the temp an agency sends a them anymore.)

So, if you're so inclined, I'd welcome prayers. (Remember, my last long-term, "permanent" day job was for a hospital system that went bankrupt in 2003. It's all been temp assignments or "permanent" jobs that quickly went bust on me ever since. I personally pray for something stable, soon.)

The Measure of a Man

Okay, I'll admit to having forgotten (fortunately) who said the following statement and on what online venue, but I read it and my blood almost boiled:

"Mister Rogers isn't the kind of man I want my son to grow up to be."

I was dumbfounded. Really? What kind of man doesn't want his son to grow up to be godly, educated, compassionate, creative, healthy, and simply good?

Well, first of all, let's remember that Fred Rogers isn't walking about in an earthly body anymore anyway, so Sonny (yes, it was a man who posted that remark), you're speaking ill of the dead, and I'm disappointed your mama and daddy didn't bring you up any better than that. I'm certain it's not because you simply don't know jack about what you're saying and are a selfish so-and-so who has no clue what a real man is all about. *

Secondly, and this is the point I want to make, I'd like to look at just what kind of man Dr. Fred Rogers was, and see if I can figure out how an immature blowhard could possibly conclude the late Dr. Rogers wasn't "man enough" to suit said blowhard:

1. Fred Rogers was ordained a Presbyterian clergyman in 1962. Oh, yeah. All that study and talk about God is WAY too girly. (Should he have remained ignorant and talked hell instead, I wonder?)

2. Fred Rogers took care of himself, swimming every day for exercise, never smoking or drinking, and following a vegetarian diet. I guess we all know that "real men" are expected to grow beer guts and fight over whether it's going to be hamburgers, dogs, or steaks on the grill. Pass the butts, please. Oh, strike the "please." Too sissy. Just grab one and light up, and keep the brews coming, woman.

3. Fred Rogers focused the majority of his career on a ministry to children, through "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood." He respected children as genuine human beings. He helped them better understand our world. He spoke to them as equals and gave them the gift of his time. Everybody knows that "real men" hang with other real men and leave all the kid stuff to the women. Everybody knows that "real men" consider only other "real men" their equals.

4. Fred Rogers was a musician. He wrote operas for his television show, he played piano, he sang songs that he wrote himself. In fact, his undergraduate degree was in musical composition. Some of the "real men" might be surprised to know that despite this, he was a happily married man, to one woman, until his death. They had two sons together. Imagine that...an artistic man. Yes, Vern, there is such a thing.

5. Fred Rogers was humble. When presented with awards, his habit was to instruct his audience to take ten seconds, in silence, to think of those people who had helped them become the people they were. In doing this, the infamous, unmanly, traitorous Dr. Rogers made grown men (and women) cry. How dare he? "Real men" focus on self, not on others. They're self-made. They're proud. They wouldn't feminize themselves by thinking of others.

6. Fred Rogers wore sport coats, and even sweaters. Yes, sweaters. Sweaters his mother knitted for him. Mr. Rogers was fussy; he changed from street shoes to house shoes on television, fercryinoutloud. He didn't like violence, and we all know that "real men" are pro-gun and pro-fighting and all that other good manly stuff. But Dr. Rogers had the nerve to file a federal lawsuit against a Texas novelty store chain when they used his photograph, superimposed with a gun and saying "Welcome to my 'hood," on t-shirts. Dr. Rogers demanded that the shirts not only not be sold, but also be destroyed. What a wuss! How feminized can you get? He should have been PROUD of all the free publicity, and he ought to have been out there himself, teaching real boys how to love and respect guns, instead of how to love and respect themselves and other people.

Yes, I'm sorry to say, Mister Rogers was hardly the "manhood" kind of man that so many Christians--yes, it was a Christian man who made the comment!--claim that men need to be, in order to be masculine and Christian. But I simply can't shake the notion that Mister Rogers was a whole lot closer to the kind of man Jesus was, than his critic must be.

Mister Rogers' offical PBS website is here.

For a Salon.com "Brilliant Careers" profile on Dr. Rogers, follow this link.


* I freely admit that I'm caricaturizing some of the "Christian manhood" movement's beliefs. I really don't know what could have prompted a Christian man to say he doesn't think Mister Rogers was man enough to be a role model for his son. But given the kind of man Dr. Fred Rogers was, I'm sorry that this father is so misinformed about the true nature of Christian manhood. May he mature past this world's lies about masculinity and femininity and come to accept the Christ-conforming humanity to which we're all called.

Faith Worth Singing, Part I: Blessed Be Your Name

The Reverend Mommy commented down below on one of "The Faith We (shouldn't) Sing" entries that it would be good to compile a list of theologically sound songs; I tend to agree with her implication that that that might be a shorter and easier list to come up with!

A song that's growing on me lately (no, not like moss) is "Blessed Be Your Name." You can link to the lyrics here.

First of all, while the song is simple musically, it incorporates a wide enough melodic range and interesting rhythm so that it does not become boring. Its form includes three distinct "sections" that contrast with each other and add to the musical interest.

Secondly, this song quotes or paraphrases Scripture extensively, but with cohesiveness. Matt Redman kept close to his theme of praising God at all times, in all circumstances.

Third (and this is a huge plus with me), the song is solidly second-person, directed at God. It's a song TO God, not ABOUT God. Paradoxically, I think it tells far more truth about who God is, than any third-person P&W song I know of.

The one thing I wish could be changed about this song is for it to be a corporate text, rather than individual. When we gather for worship, at least some of our song should be from US, the gathered Body, rather than all be from ME. Frankly, the dearth of corporate texts means there are weeks when our "contemporary" service has no corporate songs. This is one of the problems with the individualism that plagues evangelical-dom, out of which P&W-dom comes. But when the text is otherwise as good as this one, this shortcoming is not a deal-breaker.

The Ill Wind that Nobody Blows Good

Yes, that's right...it's the OBOE! A four-letter word if ever there was one.

I haven't played since I sold the blasted thing to finance a year of undergrad school "back in the day," but I "jammed for Uncle Sam" for a bunch of years playing...

...yep: OBOE. I sometimes still wake up in a cold sweat, having dreamed that my arsenal of ten perfect reeds are all either cracked or won't work because of a change in the weather. (You know that's part nightmare, part fantasy simply because NO ONE ever had ten perfect reeds at the same time; heck, nobody ever had even five at once that were better than so-so. That's God's curse on reed cane, and on oboists for being insane enough to begin oboe in the first place.)

So here's the quiz result:

What is your inner musical instrument?

You're an Oboe. Girl power?
Take this quiz!








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And as my final two cents' worth on this bizarre subject, I'll quote a bit of oboe doggerel which I know, despite the androcentric archaic language, to be all too true (apologies to the "poet," but I don't recall who wrote it; it was in a book called "The Woodwind" that I read in high school when I was learning to play):

Veiled, soft, and sad the oboe's tone;
Not veiled or soft the player's groan
On mornings when his reeds he whittles;
He swears at life, he shuns his victuals:
He wishes he had ne'er been born,
Or learned oboe and English horn.

Guest Bloggers: Rosie & Jenny, Thankful Cats

Counting our Blessings
by Rosie & Jenny

We are grateful to the only Being superior to us in all creation, our Creator, God Almighty, for the following:

1. Greenies Cat Cookies. Our slave Psalmist bought us some last night. We have shown her all day today how grateful we are for this superb gift to catkind.

2. The manufacturers of Greenies Cat Cookies, SM NuTec, for making such a great product for the enjoyment of cats.

3. Walgreens, for stocking and displaying the Ocean Fish flavor of Greenies Cat Cookies so that Psalmist would see it when she shopped there yesterday.

4. God, for creating the human species to serve the feline. We are especially grateful for our human, Psalmist, now that she has found and brought us the Greenies.

5. Our home, which Psalmist maintains for us. It is small but has a number of good places up high where we can hang out, even if Psalmist tells us we're not supposed to. Also for such a perfectly shaped bathroom sink in which to lounge. (That really sends Psalmist ballistic!)

6. Greenies. (A cat can't emphasise too much how good these are.)

7. Our food bowl, especially when Psalmist has filled it with our preferred indoor formula kibble. It may not be full enough, often enough, but we do appreciate what we get.

8. Our water bowl, again when Psalmist has filled it. We especially like it when, in the summer, she put purified water in it. Our municipality has dreadful tasting water in the summer.

9. Our toys, both the bought kind and the made kind. Catnip mice, the laser pointer, foil balls, the occasional fly on the wall...all delight a grateful cat's heart and make her play despite her dignity.

10. Each other. We aren't the best of friends and we're only adopted sisters, but with Psalmist gone so much of the time, either of us would be pretty lonely without the other. Who else would fight with us?

In honor of Thanksgiving, we, the feline singing sisters extraordinaire, Rosie & Jenny, offer the following hymn to inspire the humans and to express our grateful love to the Creator of all catkind:


For the beauty of the house, for the glory of the sink,
For the well-loved catnip mouse, for the water that we drink:
Lord of all, to thee we raise this our hymn of grateful praise.

For the kibble in our dish, for the counter where we sleep,
For the treats for which we wish, for the cabinets, dark and deep:
Lord of all, to thee we raise this our hymn of grateful praise.

For the service of our slave, for her petting and her brush,
For her lap (when she behaves), for the evening's sleeping hush:
Lord of all, to thee we raise this our hymn of grateful praise.

For thyself, best gift Divine! For humans, to catkind given,
For that great, great love of thine, peace to feline, joy to human:
Lord of all, to thee we raise this our hymn of grateful praise.

RGBP Delurkers, Welcome Here!

Happy Thanksgiving Week to all!

Here's the explanation from The Reverend Mommy:


There are so very many things in our lives that we can be thankful for. I personally, am thankful for such a wonderful group people represented by the RevGals and BlogPals and our community here online. At Bits and Odd Pieces of Mindy's Kingdom recently, some of us were noticing that there has been a drop in commenting recently. So, in honor of Mindy, Princess of Everything, we are having a Thanksgiving Delurking week! (Please notice the cow; that's for Mindy).

Place this image on your blog and announce Delurking Week, starting today and going until November 26th. When you visit a blog, you can either just say "Thank you for blogging" or place a blogstone (o) (The invention of PPB of The Ice Floe) or whatever verbage the Spirit moves you to leave.

Let the Delurking begin!

A Feast for the Eyes

These are all photos from the Japanese Garden in Portland, Oregon. It's gorgeous there in the fall. Enjoy! Courtesy of Webshots and Google Images

Epitaph

The more I think about this, the more I like it!

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

RevGalBlogPals Friday Five: Thankful

It's that time of year. In the U.S., college students will be on their way home, traffic on the highways will be at its highest point, cooking and baking will ensue. But before the gorging and napping begins, let's take a moment to give thanks.

Please tell us five things or people for which you are thankful this year.



1. God. That pretty much covers it. God's love, providence, patience, grace...all that God is and all that God lavishes on me and on us all.

2. Community. My congregation and each and every member of "us." It is a joy I have trouble describing to be a part of the body of Christ.

3. Pets. As much as I have fun with their cat blogging, portraying them as egomaniacal superior beings, my Rosie and Jenny are dear companions, dependent solely on me, and they give far better than they sometimes get from me. They are a means of God's love and grace to me.

4. Beauty. I love the beauty of the created world (particularly of my much-missed home state, Oregon--the Portland Japanese Gardens is featured in the opening photo). I love the beauty of music and art, of logic and creativity, of sense and sound. (I might as well post the text of the hymn, "For the Beauty of the Earth.")

5. Friends. I count those I know "in the flesh" and those I've been privileged to meet online. To all of you, your friendship is one of life's sweetest blessings. I am grateful to you.

Bonus. CHOCOLATE! Thanks for the yum, God!

"Lord of all, to Thee we raise this, our hymn of grateful praise."

The Absurd Photo of the Month

Thanks, Quotidian Grace, for posting this! I am still trying to catch my breath from laughing.

Pointless Family Photograph

The Faith We (Shouldn't) Sing, Part 2: Here I Am to Worship

This popular song out of the "Praise and Worship" tradition (and I have issues with that title for the movement, which I may address another time) is simply bad quality on every level, IMNSHO.

Here is a link to the text.

First of all, the music is monotonous and unimaginative. The proverbial I - IV - V (oops, in this case, I - V - IV) harmonic pattern is about as basic as it gets, and I don't mean that in a good way. The melody simply parallels the harmony in an equally boring way. The rhythm is even less inspired.

The text is awful. It falls into the individual-idolatrous trap of so many P&W songs, but does so deliberately. "Here I am to worship, here I am to bow down, here I am to say that you're my God..." Who is being worshiped? Who is being bowed down to? It's all about "me" and "here I am." Where is this? The sanctuary of the Lord? And just who are you? WE are here, yes, and WE should be BE bowing down and worshiping! (Not merely saying we're here to do it.)

Then, what's up with "I'll never know how much it cost to see my sin upon that cross." "Duh-factor," I'd say. No, we cannot in this life know the cost the Savior paid for our sins. But "seeing my sin upon that cross" is not what it's all about. The SAVIOR, the Lord of Heaven and Earth, is WHO was on that cross and is now alive. THAT is WHOM and WHY WE (not just all-important "I") worship.

Honestly, I find very little to commend this particular song. I'm trying. The verses are so-so OK, though verse 1 is still about what God did for "me." Verse 2 is much better, which makes going back to the "me-me-me" chorus that much more grating for me. Another good thing: despite there being only ONE "you" (addressing the Lord) in the chorus and despite all the "I's," it IS in second person. I guess it's all the presumptuous mentions of "I" and "my" in addressing that second person that rub me the wrong way on this one.

If you want a harmonically simple song on a similar theme that does it right, with at least an interesting rhythm and melody and a much better balance (uses "we" rather than "I" and focuses much more on God than "we"), try "We Bow Down" by Twila Paris. Not as new, but much more solid song. Yeah, it's a little too "sing-songy" for my complete liking, but solid text goes a long way with me.

Hump Day Humor: "Obituary"

A number of my blog friends have posted their "obituaries" from the Quiz Galaxy, so I thought I'd do it, too.

I always HAVE had a soft place in my heart for Mr. Potatohead; glad it's mutual.

'What will your obituary say?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Advent/Christmas Music Meme

Thanks to Sue at Inner Dorothy, here's a meme that lets me be positive about music, after ripping "RUOMOG" to shreds below. My answers are in Advent Blue and (non-liturgical) Christmas Red (given that white doesn't show up well) or Ordinary Green (for those that aren't specifically Advent or Christmas).

1. What are your favourite Advent/Christmas hymns?
I Want to Walk as a Child of the Light; People, Look East; O Little Town of Bethlehem (much better when sung to FOREST GREEN); Star Child.

2. Which are your least favourite?
I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day; There's a Song in the Air.

3. Which secular seasonal songs make you want to run screaming into traffic? Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer; The Christmas Shoes

4. Do you play Christmas music around the house and in the car? What are your favourite holiday CDs?
Of course! I usually have some sort of Baroque music playing, either instrumental (concerti grossi, mostly, by Bach, Corelli, or Telemann) or one of several favorite recordings of Handel's Messiah. I'm also partial to a cappella choral carols.


So - how about you?

The Faith We (Shouldn't) Sing, Part I: Rise Up, O Men of God

For those of you United Methodists who think there's something familiar about that title, you're correct. I'm shamelessly ripping off the title of our most recent hymnal supplement. Please don't misunderstand, though; not all--indeed, probably not most--of the songs I post in this series are included in The Faith We Sing.

I realized that for a blog that was supposed to be heavy on the music kind of posts, I haven't been living up to my own expectations. That is what gives rise to this series.

I have some strong opinions on what makes for good, and not-so-good, songs for congregational singing. This series will present examples of what we settle for, but those for which I believe we shouldn't settle.

Rise Up, O Men of God
Text: William P. Merrill, 1867-1954
Generally sung to FESTAL SONG (SM)
Composed by William H. Walter, 1825-1893

For full text, follow this link.

First of all, this hymn reeks of "this text doesn't apply to me" to the female half of the congregation. Maybe once upon a time it didn't, but an inescapable fact of the English language is that it is changing. Women no longer consider themselves part of "men." And the fact is, especially considering the full context of the hymn text, this hymn never really means to address women. So do we really need to use a hymn that excludes (over) half the congregation?

Secondly, the theology is simply terrible. Follow the link and pay particular attention to verses 2 and 3. "[The Church's] strength unequal to her task/rise up and make her great" simply isn't true. The Holy Spirit's power makes the imperfect Church equal to whatever task God calls us to do. It is not the strength of the male half of the church that will make the church great, it is the strength of the Lord Jesus himself.

Third, this hymn reinforces the church's historical error of thinking that men can more fully conform to the image of Christ than women can. Verse 4 is particularly bad about this. Women obviously cannot be "brothers of the Son of Man." And just as we need to not forget that there are men in the body of Christ, we must not forget that there are women in the body, as well. This hymn doesn't forget it, it ignores it.

"Rise Up, O Men of God" is not fit for either full congregational or for men's group singing. I suppose verse 1 is acceptable for the latter, if groups will stop with verse 1. But there are better hymns that express the need for all of us, including all the men, to be faithful disciples of Jesus Christ. It's not especially difficult to find and use them instead.

(EDIT: Thank you to the gender hierarchalist critic who made much of the fact that I typed a "u" instead of an "i" in the word "inescapable." What a terrible, horrible, unforgivable gaffe on my part! My typing error was by far the most supportable of your objections to this blog entry. By the way, I'm going to consider it a typo that you missed one of the "l"s in "Merrill" at several points in your rant against my blog entry. Your toss shattered a wall in your glass house, brother William.

I'm glad my actual objections to the rotten theology of this hymn offended you, though; your unbiblical, worldly theories about what constitutes masculinity and femininity may sell books and seminars, but that will never change the fact that they're false and ungodly theories, based on self-serving eisegesis and bad scholarship. By the way, my thoughts are my own; we women can and do think for ourselves, despite your lie about my being a mere parrot for historical secular feminists. I'm still waiting to read even one legitimate, biblical defense for the appallingly bad theology in this hymn. I'm not holding my breath. It's the same old, same old idolization of masculinity that you've been peddling for years. Talk about parroting! You really ought to stop lying through your teeth about me. I do indeed know the Scriptures AND the power of God, neither of which supports the world's practice of patriarchy which your writings show that you idolize and seek to promote. I continue to pray that you forsake your lies and come to accept the truth that we Christian egalitarian women ARE your sisters in Christ, and we are your equals in the faith. That you deny both these inescapable facts, impoverishes your soul and damages your Christian witness. Again, I pray for you to repent. As your sister in Christ, despite your lie that we Christian egalitarian women are not, I'm calling you to start showing to women, some of the respect you so loudly demand for yourself and all men. That would be a good first step toward actually deserving that respect.)

Well, this is about right!

Thanks to St. Casserole for posting her definition, and for Singing Owl for reminding me that this world (and none of the US states therein) is NOT my home.

Psalmist -- [noun]: An alien 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

A Purple (red+blue) RevGals Friday Five

Those of us who are in the United States have just been through quite a topsy-turvy election. During the campaign we heard a fair amount about red states and blue states, when in fact most of us live in some shade of purple. And so... a lighter look at those confounding colors:

1. Favorite red food: Raspberries (yum!) - Even better if combined with chocolate.

2. Tell us about the bluest body of water you've ever seen in person. Crater Lake. Indescribably gorgeous. If you ever visit Oregon (or better yet, live there), you MUST visit this spectacle in the state's only National Park.

3. It's movie rental time: Blue Planet, The Color Purple, or Crimson Tide? The Color Purple. But had "The Hunt for Red October" been a choice, I might have voted for that (both Clancey & Connery fan here). Nuh-uh on "Blue Hawaii," though. My King outranks Elvis, and is definitely alive! ;)

4. What has you seeing red these days? Politicians. Especially the newly-re-elected Texas Lieutenant Governor, whose loudest contribution to the electoral process here in Texas was to declare that repeat sex offenders should get the death penalty. What he played on and failed to speak the truth about, is the fact that the vast majority of sex offenders--who already have to register as offenders for life--did not commit violent crimes. Most were guilty of indecent exposure (most when intoxicated) or consensual sex with underage partners when they themselves were very young (such as an 18-year-old high school senior with a 15- or 16-year-old girlfriend). I don't mean that these aren't reprehensible actions. But even a second offense, even in a pro-death penalty state, cannot possibly be a capital offense. Statistically, what few people know is that approximately only six percent of sex offenders re-offend, and that's untreated offenders. With treatment, it's about three percent. Anyway, Dewhurst simply tapped into the fears and misconceptions people have about sex offenders in order to boost their opinion of him. It fries me that this is the kind of person who stands to inherit the governorship if our equally distinguished governor cannot complete his term. And as for him, I see red at his stunt of election-season "crackdowns" on the Texas-Mexico border. He ought to have been doing things that were actually effective, throughout his term. He outright lied about the state of education and teacher compensation. And because Texas is a legendary "red state," people swallowed it all and re-elected him. Aaargh!

5. What or who picks you up when you're feeling blue? The children in our church's choirs. From 3 to 15 (the one youth boy who rings handbells), they always say or do or pray something that makes my heart glad. But the adults often do, too. (See the All Saints post.)

Follow-up: All Saints' Sunday

OK, enough about the job-losing and job-hunting woes. Sunday was glorious! We celebrated the day as All Saints' Sunday. Our pianist had a line-up of jazz-inspired service music. The choir presented a Mark Hayes arrangement of "Blessed Assurance" which was about as soulful as our anglo church will ever sound. We remembered the saints who have died. We heard the Word proclaimed about what the blood of Jesus means to us, then we celebrated the Lord's Supper. It was, to my way of thinking, just the right mix of solemnity and exuberant celebration.

One of my least favorite things--applause--erupted after the anthem. But somehow, it was OK this time. It was absolutely spontaneous. The choir members were totally absorbed in singing this beloved expression of faith for God's glory. We were well-rehearsed and able to sing with abandon. We were sharing with the congregation and our God what we all hold to be true: we belong to the Lord, in whose blood we're washed and in whom is our eternal hope. So it seemed to me that applause for that particular anthem was a way the full congregation could participate in the choir's representative celebration of faith.

That may not make a lot of sense to those who've never sung in choirs. I had to think about why applause seemed so appropriate this past Sunday when it so often does not. But I would challenge any congregation to remain silent when an anthem that expresses their faith well and which is of a celebratory style, is sung well. A hearty "Amen!" is good, too, and probably more appropriate than applause (actually, we got both). But I suppose I'd rather be irritated by even inappropriate applause from enthused, engaged worshipers than by their indifferent silence.

Anyway, it was a wonderful to experience the "communion of the saints" so powerfully. I do feel somewhat sorry for churches which don't observe All Saints. It's one of the times in the Christian Year when I always give thanks to God for the gift of the liturgical calendar. It keeps us balanced in its panoramic focus throughout the year. I read once that the liturgy "entertains" us easily-distracted humans. There's a lot of truth to that! We cannot possibly comprehend all that God is, but with the help of the Christian year, we can systematically focus on many of the various aspects of God's nature and self-revelation.

Praise you, O Eternal One, for all your saints and for the Savior who calls us by his own precious name!

Hunting Again

Yep, I'm hunting once again: for a day job, that is. I'd been close to resigning and even offered to do so, at the height of the depression trouble. I've been half-killing myself to get things caught up again and was making significant progress. Apparently, however, it was not enough. Despite the days on end with few private clients, my boss insisted on making the correlation that they've lost money since I was hired. Never mind that they went with no insurance filings for nearly two months BEFORE I was hired. Never mind that the therapist did zilch to drum up general practice clients (as opposed to the court-ordered clients with whom he holds group sessions). Never mind that he has near-zero grasp of how his own business works. (He's a great therapist, but that's where his understanding ends.) Just as things have turned around, he fires me. C'est la vie. In most ways, I'm relieved. But it still bites. Their loss, though. It was too few hours for me in the first place, so I stand to make more money even temping. The sheer number of hours on top of the church position is what has me exhausted just thinking about it.

The good thing is that three different agencies have strong assignment possibilities for me, though I turned down one because of a ridiculously low hourly rate and a relatively long period of time at that rate. There's supposed to be a good desktop publishing assignment in the works that I'll hear more about tomorrow.

For All Souls

With yesterday being All Saints' Day, I've thought a lot of a Schubert lied I studied years ago, which still moves me deeply: Litanei [auf das Fest Aller Seelen]. My brother died in a tragic accident the semester I was preparing this song, which I'm sure is a major part of why it spoke so deeply to me at the time.

While not strictly speaking a sacred song, the author Jacobi tapped deeply into the spiritual realm with this text. Schubert wrote one of his most sublimely simple melodies and a hauntingly beautiful accompaniment for it. I consider this one of Schubert's most undeservedly neglected lieder. It is an exhausting song to sing, however, with its long phrases which require absolute control on the part of the singer and restraint by the accompanist. In no sense of the word is it a "fun" song to learn or to perform. However, singing this remarkable lied was, despite its technical demands, always a prayerful experience. I commend the Litanei to you.


Litanei auf das Fest aller Seelen
(Litany for the Feast of All Souls)
Author: Johann Georg Jacobi (1740-1814)
Composer: Franz Peter Schubert (1797-1828), D. 343 (1816), published 1831

For an English translation and additional information, see
http://www.recmusic.org/lieder/get_text.html?TextId=8802

Among artists who have recorded this lied, I recommend Elisabeth Schwartzkopf (vintage, native language) and Heidi Grant-Murphy (current, American).

(Verses set by Schubert are bold.)

Ruh'n in Frieden alle Seelen,
Die vollbracht ein banges Quälen,
Die vollendet süßen Traum,
Lebensatt, geboren kaum,
Aus der Welt hinüberschieden:
Alle Seelen ruhn in Frieden!

Die sich hier Gespielen suchten,
öfter weinten, nimmer fluchten,
wenn vor ihrer treuen Hand
keiner jeden Druck verstand:
Alle die von hinnen schieden,
Alle Seelen ruhn in Frieden!

Liebevoller Mädchen Seelen,
Deren Tränen nicht zu zählen,
Die ein falscher Freund verließ,
Und die blinde Welt verstieß
Alle die von hinnen schieden,
Alle Seelen ruhn in Frieden!

Und der Jüngling, dem, verborgen,
Seine Braut am frühen Morgen,
Weil ihn Lieb' ins Grab gelegt,
Aus sein Grab die Kerze trägt:
Alle die von hinnen schieden,
Alle Seelen ruhn in Frieden!

Alle Geister, die, voll Klarheit,
Wurden Märtyrer der Wahrheit,
Kämpften für das Heiligtum,
Suchten nicht der Marter Ruhm:
Alle die von hinnen schieden,
Alle Seelen ruhn in Frieden!

Und die nie der Sonne lachten,
Unterm Mond auf Domen wachten,
Gott, in reinen Himmelslicht,
Einst zu sehn von Angesicht:
Alle die von hinnen schieden,
Alle Seelen ruhn in Frieden!

Und die gern im Rosengarten
Bei dem Freudenbecher harrten,
Aber dann, zur bösen Zeit,
Schmeckten seine Bitterkeit:
Alle die von hinnen schieden,
Alle Seelen ruhn in Frieden!

Auch die keinen Frieden kannten,
Aber Mut und Stärke sandten
Über leichenvolles Feld
In die halbentschlaf'ne Welt:
Alle die von hinnen schieden,
Alle Seelen ruhn in Frieden!

Ruh'n in Frieden alle Seelen,
Die vollbracht ein banges Quälen,
Die vollendet süßen Traum,
Lebensatt, geboren kaum,
Aus der Welt hinüberschieden:
Alle Seelen ruhn in Frieden!

Children's Musical

I do want to report on my elementary-age children's choir musical, which we presented on October 15. The children were absolutely wonderful, as were the adults and youth who helped make things happen so that I merely had to direct. The subject was the book of Esther, retold with lots of literary license. Our young Queen Esther, who had the only solo of the musical, sang beautifully. The maidens' cute solo lines during the first number--a rap!--were spoken clearly, with appropriate humor, and loudly enough that most of the congregation understood them--and laughed! Our narrator (in the role of a news reporter) hammed it up delightfully. King "A" was regal, the cameraman was fabulous, and it all came together far better than I could have hoped. And yes, I managed to get all the costumes finished in time.

Oh, and I got all but one of my pledged embroidery projects done for the Lord's Acre (fall festival), and substituted a different purchased item for the one I didn't make. All told, my items sold for over $200 total in the live auction. Not bad for someone in my condition at the time.

I'm Back (I think)

Hello to all. First, let me again thank those of you who've been praying for me. I'm feeling much better now, though I've made some significant changes in my life that mean I'm spending less time online. I do want blogging to be a priority, though. So we shall see how that goes.

Secondly, I want to come clean with you. My illness is chronic clinical depression. It's likely that I've suffered from it all my life, except for the approximately 1.5 years that I've been sufficiently diagnosed and treated with an anti-depressant. The drug that works for me is, unfortunately, outrageously expensive, even in the "generic" form that recently came out. But I'm still working at getting into the VA system, I hope before I run out of the prescription that I was miraculously able to get.

ANYway, the analytical part of me that can now look at this latest crisis, now that the "fog" has largely lifted, is finding the process of digging out of it quite fascinating. (Were I dark-haired and pointy-eared, you'd think I was Spock of Star Trek fame!) But it IS fascinating. Things got very, very bad. Had it not been for God's constant presence--experienced through the gift of faith--I might have attempted suicide. There...I said it. The "S" word. It scares me that it got so bad. It reminds me how fragile we human beings can be, despite our bravado displayed to the outside world and even to our loved ones. It's been a long time since I believed the lie that "real" Christians do not get depressed. That's no more true than saying "real" Christians don't get diabetes, or high cholesterol, or breast cancer, or Alzheimer's disease. But my head still kept trying to convince my heart that I just wasn't praying hard enough, or thinking the right things, or reading the Bible enough...all the "Job's Friends" kinds of lines we tend to give people when they're suffering but which God says are "not speaking rightly" of either the sufferer or the Suffering God. (I am VERY glad my pastor preached on Job this past Sunday. It was timely for a lot of us in this church.) I suppose it helps to keep alive the illusion that there ought to have been SOME way to control my condition myself, without drugs, without God, without nuthin' 'cept my own self. The truth, however, is that depression HAPPENS (to us chronically depressed folks). Whatever is wrong with the delicate balance of brain chemistry in us--and it's too little understood at present--we need pharmaceutical help in the form of SSRIs or MSRIs to get back on track. That is a valid way for God to choose to heal us. The wonder is how we would dare to dictate to the Almighty that our drug-free faith alone must be the treatment of choice. (And how often do well-meaning Christians "preach" exactly that message? And how many suffering people never get well because of that message?)

So, praise God, I'm getting well now. It may be a while longer before I feel the full effects of the drug, but it's remarkable how much better I feel...better than at any time since I had to stop taking meds over three years ago because I lost my health insurance. At least this time I knew what drug would help. (For the blessedly uninformed, depression is treated by starting a prescription, and if the depression gets worse or no better, discontinuing it and trying another...and if necessary, another and another until the right one does the trick. Definitely NOT an exact science!)

While I don't have a big slew of readers, a majority of you are ministers, thanks to my participation in the RevGalBlogPals blogring. To you ministerial sisters and brothers, I issue a plea: encourage your depressed parishioners/church participants to seek medical help and accept drug therapy as the most likely means of getting well. I think you all probably know that, but do please make a point of it. And don't think you're immune from depression. I've read (but cannot quote exactly) that ministry statistically has one of the highest rates of depression among the professions. Know yourself well enough to recognize if you're depressed, and get help. Take it from someone who tried far too long to tough it out without the meds that can make such a night-and-day difference in her life. I would not wish that kind of miserable existing on anyone. And that's the best way I know to describe deep depression. It's terribly painful, and it's sure as anything not living. You deserve better than that, and those you serve deserve a better minister than who they will have when he or she is depressed.

I suspect that the biblical psalmist(s) from whom I take my blogging nickname was sometimes depressed. A number of the Psalms' descriptions of suffering ring true for me. In addition to Psalms 13 and 130, I commend these words from Psalm 30 to you:

O Lord, you brought up my soul from Sheol, restored me to life from among those gone down to the Pit. (v. 3)

You have turned my mourning into dancing; you have taken off my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, so that my soul may praise you and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks to you forever. (vs. 11-12; quotes from NRSV)

Many thanks to you all

Hello again. I am very touched and grateful to those who've read and commented. Things are getting better. Through nothing short of a miracle, I got enough quantity of the correct meds that I will be able to take it until the VA can kick in. It will be awhile before I've ramped up to the correct dose and really feel the full effects, but I'm already feeling a little better.

Meanwhile, it's crazy time at both jobs. My children's choir is the sermon, choir, and Scripture lesson all combined this Sunday with our Esther musical. This is the day after our all-day Fall Festival, for which I'm still scrambling to complete the items I pledged to do (hand embroidery--can't really be rushed). There are still costumes to complete for the children. All the other usual tasks are still there as well, though I did give the adult choir tonight off. And day job stuff will be better after today. I got so behind on things, it's a wonder I still have that job. I guess it doesn't hurt to work for a healthcare provider who treats people with my illness. He was the picture of patience and understanding when I was just too sick to work. So now I'm paying the piper!

Ongoing prayers would be wonderful. And thank you again for your comments and promises of prayer. I have felt them. I thank God for all my supportive friends--including you, my online friends.

More soon.

Update for friends

Hello to my friends. Just a short update. I had a disastrous trial with a medication that I thought would help with a condition I mentioned a couple of entries back. I finally seem to have it out of my system, which means I'm back to the not-so-good place I was almost two weeks ago when I got the prescription sample. Still don't have the form I need in order to receive VA care.

The good news is, I'm better than I was a week ago. I missed too much work, though, at a critical time. I'd appreciate your prayers.

More when I feel better.

Why Is It? (RANT ALERT!)

(You've been warned...what follows is a bona-fide, gen-u-ine, hissy-fit RANT!)

WHY IS IT:

Whenever there is discussion in progressive Christian circles about the place of women in the church, inevitably a few men will start expounding on the pro-patriarchy position and attempt to derail the discussion into yet another argument over how to interpret 1 Timothy 2:12 ff.

It's one thing if the venue's "regulars" are conservative evangelicals. It's another thing entirely when the venue is one set up by women for the purpose of discussing these things, and yet another when the venue's POV is an alternative to the conservative evangelical position. But I've never seen it fail. There are some men in the cyber community who seem to think it's their god-given responsibility to pound people over the head with their proof-texted, eisegeted tradition that "women can't teach or have authority over men." Some are a little less blunt than that, but some aren't. And there is the occasional woman who will also jump in with "How can you disrespect God and the Bible by saying women can be pastors?" Is it any wonder that some people, including some women, think the church is nothing but a bunch of androcentric people led by power-hungry control freaks who twist the Bible to suit their own positions of privilege? WHERE IS THE GOSPEL OF JESUS CHRIST IN THIS RHETORIC ???

AAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!

(And since this is my blog, I can say that!)

Uninsured in America

It's a bummer being uninsured in America. I don't mean not having auto insurance (my state requires that), or life insurance, I mean health insurance. My position as "psalmist" (music minister) at my church is part-time, with too few hours to make me eligible to participate in my conference's health plan. My "day job" (also part-time) offers no insurance. It's been this way, or a variation of this way, since I lost my job working for a hospital system over three years ago. I had a couple of health issues that mean I can qualify only for "risk pool" insurance, which is WAY more expensive than a lower-income person could possibly afford. (Paying over 1/3 of one's monthly salary on health insurance just isn't possible at my income level.) And the really insane part of it is, I'm a basically healthy, asymptomatic person when I take a couple of prescriptions regularly. At least in Texas, insurance companies can and do tell people who aren't in an employer group, who could be perfectly healthy on less than $200 per month worth of prescriptions, that they're uninsurable. (You can imagine what they do with people who have life-threatening conditions.) All we want is to be able to afford to particpate in a health plan that will protect us from total financial collapse if, God forbid, we ever got seriously sick or injured. I don't expect free healthcare and I don't think most Americans do. It also shouldn't be so expensive that only the wealthy can afford it. And more and more, that is the case. If we're also not below the poverty level in income, there's not much we can do except self-pay and pray to God that we don't become seriously ill or injured.

Anyway, now one of my conditions has started figuratively kicking my hindquarters. I won't go into the details, but it's making it very difficult to function well. I haven't been myself in a long time, but I'm *really* not myself now. I'm taking steps to deal with it, and is it ever eye-opening. I discovered not too long ago that I could have been receiving very affordable care through the VA system all this time. (I was under the mistaken impression that the closest facility was a hospital over an hour away.) The only trouble is, I don't have an official copy of the paperwork necessary to get me registered for care. So it's that familiar "hurry up and wait" with getting a duplicate from the agency that handles military records. Meanwhile, my "day job" employer's physician's office manager kindly squeezed me in to see the physician yesterday, and while I couldn't get samples of what I had been taking, I got a sufficient quantity of another drug that I'm hoping will also be effective (takes a while for blood levels to build up and show improvement), until I can get started in the VA system.

I think about people a lot like me, in similar circumstances, who are not veterans. Honest people, working wherever they can to keep the income coming in, not wanting to defraud anyone or accept handouts, wondering what they'll do if they or their loved ones need medical care. Forget about dental! Forget about anything elective! Just plain "major medical" would be a blessing, if only the insurance companies would accept them for less than the amount they are paying for mortgage/rent.

In the big picture, we do have the most advanced, amazing medical care in the world here in America. Delivery of it is, however, a serious problem. I often wonder if nationalizing healthcare could screw up the delivery more than it already is. Providers' hands have been tied for years by insurance companies whose goal is to keep from paying everything they possibly can. Their reimbursement rates from the insurance companies have gone down, rather than up, for years now (that's a dirty little secret the insurance companies who're raising your rates won't tell you). The only way a physician or other provider gets paid anywhere near the full rate for his/her services is when people self-pay, as I did yesterday. I don't begrudge that doctor his fee, even though it is more than I make in a day. I do have a big problem with insurance companies making record profits while lowering reimbursement rates and denying coverage and dropping members in order to make those profits. They're also often not reimbursing providers according to the "take it or leave it" contracted rates they strong-armed the providers into accepting; the tactic seems to be that if they delay long enough, providers will either give up or they'll delay to the point that the appeals period has expired. States like Texas give their insurance commissions nothing much in the way of enforcement teeth When companies encounter regulatory resistance in a state, they tend to stop doing business in that state and focus on more insurance-friendly states.

I think members of Congress ought to suddenly find themselves uninsured. You want to serve in Congress, representing us (your uninsured constituents), you try walking in our shoes for a while. See how you like paying for your check-ups, cancer screenings, surgeries, emergency visits, dental treatments, lab work, and so forth all out of your own pocket. See if your long-time physician will still see you without insurance (actually, he or she might just welcome that, since that's the only way he or she gets a full fee). See how your hospital admission process goes when there's no insurance card. Get that sticker shock at how much your prescription drugs really cost. Maybe, just maybe, you'd decide that the how-many millions of us who face this every day, deserve a little creative thinking on your part on how we might be sure that the greatest healthcare in the greatest country on earth, gets to all its citizens without bankrupting them.

What are they teaching young (comp) women these days?

I know sometimes, when people are feeling threatened in some way, they lash out at those they've been told are their "enemies." I just read what I think is one of those lashings-out, and it hurts me deep in my heart--mostly for the young woman who said it.

A false dichotomy has been set up in the pro-patriarchal circles of Christianity between traditional "roles" for women vs. women who are free to minister as God calls them (including in traditional "roles," if that's God's desire). Unfortunately, the latter are mischaracterized as "demanding their rights." The young woman I mentioned, was speaking primarily about finding fulfillment as a woman. Her premise is, if we (as women) are seeking to please God, we won't [demand our] 'ministerial rights,'" apparently meaning that women will content themselves with denying any call from God that would require them to minister outside of or in addition to ministries to family and home. I really do think that this woman has been indoctrinated to believe that female ministers are stridently "demanding their rights" and simply choosing of their own accord to rebel against responsibilities to family. I know I've heard those kinds of charges often enough from other Christian pro-patriarchalists.

I think I know what the threat is: by her very obedience to God's calling, a woman who ministers publicly to the entire church is a challenge to the notion that God calls women only to home, family, children's, and women's ministries. We are uncomfortable reminders that she hasn't been told the truth about the limits of God's will for women. We're reminders that women, no less than men, are responsible for discerning the will of God and doing it, all of it, wholeheartedly.

No, most women are not being called by God to ministries of teaching and preaching to the full congregation. But yes, most women are being called by God to some form of ministry that will challenge their assumptions about what they can and cannot do. Trusting God is a huge, sometimes frightening thing. But the implications of *not* trusting God should frighten us even more. Do we really think it will "fly" with God to say, "But my husband (and/or pastor) said I wasn't allowed to do (whatever the calling entails), so I was being obedient to him." Obedience to a human being is not the same as obedience to God, and it is high time that the pro-patriarchy leaders stopped teaching that it is.

And it is high time that Christians stop perpetuating the lie that says female ministers are "demanding their rights." They're simply obediently exercising the authority that God gives them to serve the church as God calls them. If you don't like that, don't attend a church where they serve. It's not necessary to lie about their motivation, and by extension to deny that God has the prerogative and every right to call them to serve as they do.

Our Insults Are Showing (and telling)

I've been visiting on a remarkable young woman's blog this past week or so, ever since she quoted me there. She is sorting out some things pertaining to how much of the conservative stereotype of the ideal woman, which she grew up with and assumed was scriptural, really has a solid basis in Scripture.

I've tried to tread very lightly there, because that rarest of rarities--civility--seems to be the rule of the day. I've decided not to link to that blog nor to call further attention to them. Not sure why, exactly, but that seems right for now.

Why it's getting any mention here at all is because one of my all-time, least-favorite insults showed up in the comments there yesterday: "Feminized men." When it did, I asked the commenter to clarify what she meant by that term. (Like so many other phrases and terms popular among pro-patriarchy Christians, there doesn't seem to be any real consensus when it comes to defining them.) She seems to basically hold with the "Wild at Heart" stereotype of the manly sort of man, one who seeks adventures, works with his hands, isn't tame, and who brings up his sons to play with guns and be boisterous because that's what boys do. (She said that boys who are expected in the schools to sit down, be quiet, not play with guns aren't being allowed to be boys.)

I am disappointed to see this stereotype being bought into, but I know that's simply where many young Christians, men and women, are required by their teaching and traditions to be. And to the extent that individual women find a rugged "Marlboro Man" (hopefully sans the cigarette!) to be more their "type" than a quieter, artistic sort of man, there's nothing wrong with that! I doubt she's actively lobbying against male dancers, introverted male desk workers, male clergy (a less than overtly rugged calling, to be sure!), and so forth. I'm hoping that she, like so many Christians, simply hasn't thought through the reasons why she would choose to declare so many men "feminized."

I find human beings to each be created unique, masculine or feminine simply by virtue of being created male or female respectively, and not all are easily boxed into culturally defined patterns. I've seen the hurt those patterns cause some men, such as men who are gifted artists, dancers, musicians, etc. I think it can also hurt women who don't fit easily into the "captivating" mold, who are more adventurous than some women find comfortable. I never cease to be amazed at the unique combination of traits and passions God places in each one of us. I think sometimes people go way overboard in declaring some of those traits/passions "feminine" and others "masculine." I read on one particular website that advocates "gender roles," and was shocked to find that nearly every one of the aspects of the Fruit of the Spirit was called "feminine"! Then, it goes on to say that only men are to be spiritual warriors. I don't think we can divide up the Bible that way into "feminine" and "masculine."

I've been disturbed over the past number of years at how quick people are--including women--to use anything to do with "feminine" as an insult. It shows in many of the vulgar ways people of the world insult others. To insult a woman, you refer to her sexually and to her personally as less than human. But to insult a man, you attribute female sexuality to him, or else you call into question his mother's virtue. It says a lot, albeit subtly, about how our English-speaking society (de)values women. If you declare a man "effeminate," "feminized," or some less couth reference to the female, you lessen his worth as a man and as a human being. Yet the opposite is not generally true. Instead, you lessen a *woman's* value by assuming she is not attracted to men, is promiscuous, has an unattractive body, or some such. Calling her "mannish" is not a compliment, but it is a much milder insult than saying a man is "effeminate." I think this has roots in our society for so long considering it just "the way it is" to think that women are not as intelligent, not as fully human, as men.

In short, we have a value hierarchy (traditionally) in our society, and it looks something like this:

1. Alpha male
2. Unattractive-looking male who conforms to other "masculine" stereotypes
   
3. Male, but non-conforming to "masculine" stereotypes
4. Attractive, stereotypically "feminine" female
5. Unattractive female who conforms to other "feminine" stereotypes
   
6. Female, but non-confroming to "feminine" stereotypes

It reminds me of the sad old prayer, in which the Jewish man prayed his thanks that the Holy One did not create him a slave, a Gentile, or a woman.

Now I am mindful that, in their own system and to those who buy into their system, pro-patriarchy Christians at least do lip service to "respecting" women. Fit their mold and don't rock the boat, and there will be a modicum of respect if you are a woman. The problem is, not all women, and not all men, fit their molds. God doesn't respect those molds. Both men and women are expected to grow into the people God created them to be, not necessarily the people the pro-patriarchalists insist we have to be. When by the Spirit of Almighty God you outgrow that mold, you have a dilemma: Obey God, or obey the patriarchal pattern they say is required of you and every other member of your gender.

There comes a time when we have to think about what our rules and regulations say about us. The portions of Scripture that define its consistent themes (Exodus 20:1-17 [the Decalogue] , Deuteronomy 6:4-5 [The Shema], Micah 6:8 ["What does the Lord require...], Matthew 22:34-40 [The Great Commandments], Matthew 28:19-20 [The Great Commission], and John 13:34-35 [The New Commandment], among many others) take what could seem complex and reveal to us that the laws of God are simple (though never easy to obey in their fullness). The rules of "gender roles" are one of the many ways that present-day Christians burden believers with requirements that God does not place upon them.

All this to say, I think we need to "mind our witness" when speaking of others, whether in the world or of one another in the church. Like it or not, the non-Christians of the world pay attention to the respect we do and do not show one another. I believe that declaring certain men--and churches--"feminized" is a thoughtless, malicious, and false means of merely insulting those we have decided we need not love. It is a way we keep waging war against those we (not God) have decided to declare "outside" our comfortable, easy definition of "Christian." Us vs. Them, with God on the "us" side, of course.

Now if the woman who brought up the "feminized men" insult happens to visit here and read this post, she is certainly free to upbraid me for using her preferred terminology as an example of this much larger practice within the conservative church. I freely postulate that most Christians who do this have not given the practice careful thought; perhaps they are merely repeating what they have been taught by those whose opinions and positions they respect. I firmly believe, however, that the time has come for us to recognize that human beings created male, are masculine by virtue of their being male. Human beings created female are feminine by virtue of their being female. Outward conformity to roles defined by 1950's upper-middle class American values does not make one masculine or feminine. Declaring such roles "Christian" does not make them so. And insulting fellow human beings by calling them "feminized" because they don't conform to such "roles" is, frankly, sinful and needs to cease. The same goes for bemoaning the "feminized" church. The truth is, Jesus Christ, the same yesterday, today, and forever, doesn't need the cultural conformity police to decide the church is too pink or too blue. So long as we're blood red (as in, covered by the precious blood of our Redeemer), whether we're feminine or masculine enough to suit anyone else really doesn't matter. We're the bride of Christ, being transformed into his likeness, serving Christ as he reconciles all creation to God. "Feminized"? Please...get real! Stop bowing down to the idol of "gender roles" and remember Who, alone, deserves our worship!

Guest Bloggers: Rosie & Jenny, Singers Extraordinaire

Greetings, friends of our human slave Psalmist. Rosie & Jenny here. We just sang "Happy Birthday" to our cousins Whistle and Fish, the one-year-old-today officially now CATS!!! over in the Gulf Coast area. Our human STILL doesn't have any pictures of us that we can upload (have you ever known a lazier human?), so our alter egos will have to do to prove that not only are we beautiful, we are talented:

Jenny: I'll go first. Here's me (with green contacts covering my beautiful one-gold & one-copper eyes) singing one of our human's favorite roles, the Queen of the Night, in Mozart's The Magic Flute. (Psalmist doesn't have the high "f" this role requires--she's proven this too often for our delicate ears' comfort. But she still really likes the Vengeance Aria. I sing it for her every now and then so she can get a fix...or at least, I lip-sync it with the CD! By the way, I really do look a lot like this lovely cat diva, only my mane is even longer and fluffier. (thinking to myself...Psalmist needs to buy me a pearl and diamond choker like the one in the picture. I would be oh-so-gorgeous in fine jewelry!).

Rosie: Here I am! Now it takes a lot of make-up to get my cute brown-and-white tabby self to look like a siamese singing Madame Butterfly, but I suffer for my art--and a kimono hides a multitude of feline figure flaws! Sad to say, Psalmist isn't a particular Puccini fan, so I don't get to sing this lovely, tragic role very often. I think she's just jealous because she has just a so-so chamber voice and couldn't handle romantic opera at all. Besides, I'm so much prettier than Psalmist is, and it takes a great beauty to pull off this role. (I'm way prettier than Jenny, too...but don't tell her *I* said so!)

Jenny: I heard that! (Hiss---Growl---bat, scratch--Hisssss!)

Rosie: Gotta go, human blog readers. There's a big fluffy drooler here who needs to be reminded who's Top Cat in this household.

Day-Late Hump Day Humor: On Notice!

Thanks to St. Casserole, I've got a hump day humor pic, albeit a day late. Just haven't felt too humorous here lately. Her custom "You're on Notice" board gave me a good laugh. Here's mine. (You can go here to create an "On Notice" list of your own.)

Of feminism, racism, and patriarchy among Christians

I've been doing some painful reading lately. I knew it would be painful; perhaps this reveals a latent masochism I didn't know I had.

As a Christian who is committed to the equality of all persons which underlies the Holy Scriptures, it's always difficult to read much of the writing of people equally committed to finding patriarchy mandated in those same Scriptures. What's truly sad right now, however, is the falsehood and animosity toward us egalitarian Christians that many pro-patriarchalists are using to "defend" their preferred lifestyle.

One example is a group that identifies themselves as "Christian Anti-Feminists." Their description's opening sentence reads, "Christian Feminist is an oxymoron." Now I know this to be absolutely false, given the many people I know personally who are both Christian and feminist; I also happen to be both. This assertion, however, reveals a fundamental fallacy of the group's position, one common to many Christians who use "feminist" as their f-word of choice: Feminism, as they describe it, is a philosophy of female supremacy. This is why this group goes on to say (paraphrasing here) "Putting Christian in front of 'racist' doesn't make racism Christian." Of course it doesn't! This is why I have trouble understanding how Christians can endorse patriarchy as Christian, when it is actually antithetical to fundamental Christian teachings. (More about that in a moment.) The corrective to this kind of falsehood about feminism is to lay one's hands on a decent dictionary and find out what feminism really is. The word can't be taken at face value; it refers to the belief that both women and men are entitled to the same rights as fellow members of the human race. Unlike "racist," which means a belief in the superiority of one race over others, "feminism" in no way stands for any belief in the superiority of women. In fact, it is a highly insulting thing to so thoroughly mischaracterize "feminism" as to equate it with the gender version of "racism." I'm not certain this wasn't intentional on the part of the individual(s) who set up that particular group...but then, I'm not certain that it WAS, either. Either way, however, the rhetoric of this group makes it clear that they're not about to give up their inaccurate beliefs about feminism any time soon. That strawman is too easy to knock down in their quest to portray men as victims of feminists' attempts to take over the church and the world. Telling the truth about feminism and feminists after all this time would be inconvenient, to say the least!

It would also help if the "anti-feminists" of the Christian persuasion out there, would remember that just as there are Christian and non-Christian cab drivers, and school teachers, and physicians, there are plenty of Christians AND non-Christians who believe that women--like men--are members of the human race and therefore have certain "inalienable human rights." Just because you're offended by the worst behavior and writings of non-Christian feminists, doesn't give you the right to lie about Christian feminists by saying they don't exist and/or attributing the worst of the secularists' beliefs to those Christians. The evidence of Christian feminists and our true beliefs are all around you, including in your churches. (I think I just heard a collectively aghast, "Not in MY church!")

There are also a couple of weird little online conversations about (hold on to your hats, here) Christian egalitarians promoting a kind of patriarchy. (We don't, of course...but hang in there just a little longer while I explain.) These conversations have a common source in one woman who likes to pretend and contend that Christian egalitarians are actually communists. (I'll leave it at that. That's such an absurdly false notion that nothing further needs to be said.) The patriarchy nonsense goes like this: Patriarchy is God's design for the human race because God is our Father. Since God is our Father, patriarchy is good. Therefore, to say that patriarchy is anything but God's good design is to deny the Fatherhood of God, which makes the devil the father of any such person. This means that since egalitarians say that patriarchy is not commanded or commended in the Scriptures (which is in fact what most egalitarians do say, since that is the truth), this proves that egalitarians endorse a form of patriarchy in which their father is the devil. (How's THAT for a clever insult and denial of the very faith of their Christian egalitarian brothers and sisters?) This all piggy-backs on a conversation not long ago in which an extreme patriarchalist author, much respected at his own small venue, wrongly claimed that an egalitarian woman there was calling patriarchy "evil" (she was not), and that in doing so, she was dangerously close to committing the unforgiveable sin. Here again, since the assertion is so laughably false, I'm not going to comment any further. However, it is not difficult to see where the seeds of the "egalitarians are children of their father, the devil" claims were first planted.

All that, because some egalitarians do say that patriarchy is evil. I happen to believe that it is, because patriarchy is an extrabiblical construct that invariably requires some human beings (all men) to usurp the power that is rightly God's alone, in order to control other human beings (all women). In the case of Christians who believe patriarchy is a godly thing, they prooftext an elaborate set of rules and "roles" that require all married men to be the leaders of their wives and all church leaders to be men, to whom all women must submit. They must make unfounded assumptions about theological meanings of creation order, attire, modes of learning, definition of "church," and the nature of authority in the exercise of spiritual gifts, that are then defended by out-of-context verses and fragments that deal with entirely different issues. They ignore context altogether in most of their defenses and leave out entirely God's sovereign prerogative in how the Holy Spirit works in marriage and church. That doesn't matter. What matters is that patriarchy be (re)established as "God's way," by whatever means necessary.

Patriarchy is an ancient practice rooted in the rule of the stronger over the weaker. It feeds on and fosters misogyny in society, keeping women and children marginalized and dependent upon fellow flawed human beings for their very survival. Here in the affluent West, where society is at least somewhat egalitarian, we have seen that it is possible to set aside patriarchy in favor of the equal human rights for which Americans have fought so hard and which we claim to cherish. Those who would abridge the human rights of women and deny the image of God in them by enforcing patriarchy, fail to recognize that patriarchy is defined by the surrounding culture; it is never established by God. God created the human race male and female, declaring humanity "very good" in that initial design. Man and woman are halves of the human race ideally matched to each other, declared so by God in the beginning. Only when sin entered the world did God observe that the man would (NOT "must") rule over the woman, while the woman would (NOT "must") desire him inordinately. Neither the undue desire nor the ruling over is commended by God, and certainly neither is commanded. In our fallen state, that is how humans tend to act: the bigger, stronger half seeks to dominate the more vulnerable half who was created to be his ideal counterpart, even while she turns away from God and eagerly toward him. He usurps God's place in her life and she accepts him as her lesser god. Both, in their sinful selfishness, use each other instead of relying on God as the ruler of their lives.

As Christians, we find a starkly different paradigm commanded for our life together. Each of us is to defer to the other, to practice both self-sacrificial love and a chosen, willing submission. No matter what positions of power and authority this world may give us, as Christians we set them aside in order to be the servants of all. Even in the church, even in the home, and particularly in the one flesh unity of marriage, in Jesus Christ, the "wisdom" of this world is turned upside down. In weakness is strength. In chosen slavery to others, we lead. In poverty, riches. In surrender, victory. In Christ, we find no divisions of nationality, earthly inheritance, or gender; we are all one. We can choose to surrender again to the yoke of slavery, or we can live regenerate in the freedom Christ continues to offer us.

So yes, I believe patriarchy is evil. God, who created all that is, is the Ruler of us all. King and Father, Rock and Source, Shield and Strength. Human "patriarchs" cannot and should not presume to Almighty God's place of authority in our lives. Each of us called Christian is a servant of Jesus Christ, our Head and Leader. We serve in his name and as he calls us, each and all. As our Teacher and Lord washed his disciples' feet, he taught us that we ought to wash one another's feet. Let NONE of us demand from any other, a subservience that would legislate what Christ showed us we should ALL choose freely to embrace in our life together. Let none of us fall for the lie that patriarchy is God's best. That is what the world, historically, has believed. The legacy of patriarchy is sin, for that is all this world's principalities and powers can ever offer. Christ's Way is much more excellent.

Things are "percolating"

I suspect that if I only had eyes to see as God sees, I would recognize remarkable processes at work. As it is, I'm seeing some glimpses of possibilities for which circumstances are coming together.

My church held a "Missions Fair" yesterday after worship. After a good ol' Methodist potluck lunch, we heard representatives of various local and regional missions, explored their agencies' displays, and finally helped assemble overseas school kits in homemade book bags created by various church members.

One speaker represented "Depression Connection," a good solid ongoing ministry in our annual conference. They are trying to expand the number of support groups in our area. I've been getting nudges for a while that I need to look into volunteering for small group facilitation, but between my schedule and a lack of need at my own church, I hadn't identified anyone to approach about this. "Ding" - connection made. I learned afterward that my pastor had contacted the speaker in response to an "ad" asking for volunteers and venues, but she'd not been sure we'd be much help to him because so far no one had "surfaced" as potential facilitators. So both my pastor and the agency rep were quite pleased with my volunteering for group facilitation.

In the discussion following this event, my pastor also indicated she would be speaking with our Pastor/Staff Parish Relations Committee concerning long-term staff needs and an eventual expansion into "general" ministry areas for me. We also talked about our church's immediate need for a staff coordinator for children's ministry--our current volunteer is spread too thin and seems incapable of delegating any tasks. Though there is no money for this at present, we do recognize the need and are seeing an increase in new families with elementary age children in our church, due to intentional efforts at reaching these families in our growing community. I have agreed to be an unofficial liaison for the present time so that we can begin to build a children's council; this would do wonders for keeping us accountable and eliminate some of the "double-booking" that comes from people not talking to one another about event scheduling.

Anyway, my point is: I'm beginning to find outlets for my skills and gifts in other areas of ministry beyond music. Music's going well as well, as we begin to get geared up for the fall. It's just that sometimes I long for those longer-term eyes, as the Spirit percolates things through my soul and I wonder what's "cooking." (This Christian "not being in charge of my own life" thing sometimes can chafe!)

What the Bible Is Not

I recently read a rather smug piece that described the Bible as "an owner's manual for what God created." I was amused at first at such a simplistic mischaracterization of the Holy Scriptures. As I read, however, I realized that the writer was on a tirade against egalitarians, falsely accusing us of denying the "manual" as well as the Creator. I surfed away from that short little poison pit with a mixture of sadness at such fundamental "missing the point," and anger that someone who knows very well how wrong he is, would enjoy making his false portrayal of his philosophical enemies ("enemies" is his term, not mine) yet again. It's an old, old game. Stupid, really, since anyone who has read any egalitarian writings knows we do not deny either the Bible or God. What we deny is that patriarchy is godly, commanded, or commended in the Scriptures.

Anyway, after the anger dissipated, I realized that this fellow did me one favor. He reminded me that there are lots of ways Christians misuse and mischaracterize the purpose of the Scriptures in order to futher their own agendas. So here's my (unfinished) list of some things the Scriptures are NOT:

1. An "owner's manual." If there's any Owner of anything in the created order, it is the Creator, who hardly needs a manual.

2. An "instruction manual" for life. This is mostly not true. While the Scriptures do contain some instruction, it is incomplete and mostly useless without a vital relationship with the Teacher, the Living incarnate Word of God (Jesus Christ). The promised Counselor, the Holy Spirit living in us, will reveal all the Scriptures have to teach us.

3. A set of "predictions" of the future. The apocalyptic threads of Scripture tell the truth of God about ultimate good and evil, often in allegorical and image-rich ways. The Bible, however, is not intended to be a code book about future events. Guess what, kids? We know the ending, and God wins. Our job is not to predict dates and events, our job is to be faithful in spreading the good news while we look eagerly to the future.

4. A book of law. There are lots of laws in Scripture, some of which we would do well to follow and some which, quite frankly, simply no longer apply in their specifics. We Christians know and follow the Fulfillment of the Law, the Lord Christ himself. He taught us that if we love God with our totality and love neighbor as ourselves, all the specifics of the law will sort themselves out.

5. A blueprint for society. Uh, no. We're to be the salt and light in the society that IS, not remake society over into a theocracy. If we're faithful in spreading the gospel, society will be remade on the level God desires. Anything else is superficial, imposed rather than chosen, and will not last. Society changes for the better when citizens' hearts and lives change.

I look forward to readers' further "The Bible is not..." comments.

Precious in God's Sight

It's been a difficult couple of weeks, for many reasons. Compared to many people, I have no reason to whine, and I promise not to--at least, not much! However, I am physically tired, mildly ill, fed up with the hellish heat that is inescapable at the height of the eight-month Texas summer, trying to recover from an overwhelmingly heavy workload last week, and worn down by a rather silly yet sad online situation. I'm praying on all counts. It's the latter issue that I have a need to "process" right now. This problem centers around some really bizarre, pathetic harrassment by someone who, due to her thinking I'm someone I'm not, has decided to smear me.

So far, "Psalmist" is fine. It's my other blog persona, which I keep totally separate from this one, that is being targeted. If she ever discovers this blog, I will have to take fairly drastic action. She comments to the other blog every day, sometimes several times, always in a manner almost certainly calculated to violate the comments guidelines that I had to post because of her VERY inappropriate comments. She is also the reason I had to resort to full comment moderation for the blog. I'd just yank the thing down, except that it's a ministry of sorts; I work hard to keep it safe for people to tell stories about a specific kind of experience, in the hopes that they grow stronger in the telling. Perhaps the unacceptable situations they tell about will improve as a result as well.

My biggest problem isn't actually with the person spamming and attempting to control the comments. My problem is my own attitude. It's very easy to become exasperated and, in that state, one of my worst faults--sarcasm--can escape if I'm not very careful. What to do?

Well, as I said, I pray. This series of unpleasant interactions has been the impetus for MUCH prayer! And sometimes prayer is answered quickly, in a way we can recognize and put to good use. That happened this evening. While praying over yet another comment that clearly needed to be rejected (calling someone--me--a "terr0rist" is against the guidelines. [Sorry about the zero, but I don't want keyword searches to help her make a connection to this blog!]) I know what the individual looks like, from a few months back when I stumbled onto her husband's ministry website. Just a short time ago, God blessed me with a vision, of a sort I get now and then, in which I saw this middle-aged woman as a little girl of about two or three years old. Tiny, dimple-faced, curly dark hair and laughing smile and eyes. Altogether adorable. And as has happened before, when there is conflict with someone, God has made it clear that *this* is how the Almighty sees this precious little one...and in my personally unique toddler version, how God sees me, as well. We're just little children in the sandbox of this sin-riddled world. Some of us play better with others than the rest do. Some are enfants terribles. Yet the sandbox is the only place for us to play together.

What this vision taught me is that God, the quintessential "permissive parent," doesn't issue time-outs or other kinds of punishment, nor are we spared the consequences of our spats. God also doesn't delegate punishment or manipulation of consequences to me. So while the "reject comment" button is my responsibility to use wisely and impartially, that's all that's necessary. I don't need to respond in any other way. I need to be prepared to graciously publish any comments that may, in the future, conform to the guidelines, even if they are constructively critical of me. And I don't need to feel guilty for rejecting a comment in which I'm accused of things I haven't done and in which I'm called a "terr0rist." I'd do it in a heartbeat for anyone else; I don't need to hesitate when I'm the target.

There she is again. Bouncy curls and charming smile. Chubby knees and ruffled socks with mary janes. Pretty red dress. High-pitched, musical laugh. Ah...no wonder her Creator treasures her so! Not only the beauty of a lovely little girl, but the beauty of an eternal soul, bought at the highest possible cost. Dear Lord, help me to see this daughter of yours as you see her, no matter how wide a barrier sin may erect between us. Please grant me the grace of this image every time I am tempted to "give her what she deserves." And would it be too much to ask that her heart may be softened as well, especially toward the dear child she has mistreated for such a long time? Her horrible words to her break my heart; I know they're devastating to the one she targets with them. Heal us, heal us all, O Great Physician. May the peace you promised, not of this world, flood our hardened hearts and melt away all our strife. For your own sake I ask it. Amen.

Ten Books

I have been "tagged" for a book meme, courtesy of Singing Owl. Thanks--I think!

I've always been the odd one out in a family that did not really value education or reading for its own sake, for I dearly loved to read. It was a difficult childhood, partly because of this, but reading took me to safer, lovelier places. So please bear with me as I list books from my early years along with more recent titles.

1. One book that changed your life:
Ragman and Other Cries of Faith, Walter Wangerin, Jr. This book of short stories is incredibly powerful. I recommend them all, but "An Advent Monologue" contains what I have come to think of as the best non-Bible motto for my life: "I can make good come out of evil; I AM the good come out of evil." (shivers even now just to think of this story)

2. One book that you’ve read more than once:
A Wrinkle in Time, Madeleine L'Engle. It's been years ago now since I read this book last, but I used to read it once a year or so. I still think it is one of the best written science fiction books ever, perhaps because though it was written for children, it wasn't written "down to" children. Thus, it is both very accessible and relatively sophisticated. Both appeal to me.

3. One book you’d want on a desert island:
Even it if is cheating, I would want the Bible, preferably an interlinear, along with a Greek and a Hebrew lexicon so that I could improve my very basic skills.

4. One book that made you laugh:
You've Got to Dance with Them What Brung You, Molly Ivins. It's pretty bad when you can't recall the last funny book you read that wasn't primarily pictures (as in Bad Cat, which was wickedly funny. But Molly, the quintessential liberal Texas colunist and good ol' gal, can always make me laugh. Her columns, particularly when they focus on Texas and/or Texas politics, are just edgy enough to make you think, but not so much as to be genuinely mean-spirited. She's an equal-opportunity insulter, an old-fashioned observer of the human condition, Texas political style. I have to say, it's almost as funny to read the negative reviews of her books on Amazon. (It's humor, ah say, it's HUMOR, suhn!)

5. One book that made you cry:
Charlotte's Web, E.B. White. I will never forget being nine years old, reading one Saturday morning when I was probably supposed to have been cleaning my room, crying my eyes out because Charlotte, the noble spider, died.

6. One book that you wish had been written:
The Life and Times of an Apostle: An Autobiography, Junia [the Apostle].

7. One book that you wish had never been written:
Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus: A Practical Guide for Improving Communication and Getting What You Want in Your Relationships, John Gray. What cr*p! What's scary is how many "Christian" books echo the same ridiculous themes of women and men being first male and female, and only secondarily fellow human beings.

8. One book you’re currently reading:
Jesus: A Novel, Walter Wangerin, Jr. I'm enjoying this book immensely! A strong, human (and yes, of course, divine) Jesus, and his very Jewish mother: fiesty, strong in her own right, very human but passionate about those she loves. Wangerin is a master of character development and description.

9. One book you’ve been meaning to read:
Woman Be Free , Patricia Gundry. I got this a couple of months ago when I ordered some CBE books...I must be the only egalitarian Christian who HASN'T read it yet! Pat, I promise I will, as soon as I'm done with the novel. (Slow going because I'm so sleep-deprived and get through only 10-20 pages before drifting off.)

10. Now tag five people: Catherine (Come to the Table), Lorna (See-through faith, St. Casserole, St. Inuksuk, Sue (Inner Dorothy)