Friday, May 09, 2008

For the Motherless and the Childless



empty arms

empty heart

empty hole in the soul

seeking she-who-is-not-here

and child-who-never-came


only a white rose to wear

for the one-who-was-incapable-of-mothering

and

no one to rise up and call me blessed,

or wear a red rose for me


Lord, how I love my sisters

and their children!


but you know,

in my deepest silent honest place

how empty my arms are

and how my motherless heart weeps

and how my soul aches

on this day

dedicated to

mothers.


You,

who gave me first and second birth,

wrap your everlasting arms

around me once again,


and around all those whose

arms are empty

and whose hearts long to nurture

and whose souls cry out


for


mother.


Please note that, like all my blog entries (except where otherwise attributed), this entry is my original writing. If you would like to link to it, you are more than welcome to do so. Please do not copy it for reading or distribution elsewhere without my permission, which I will be happy to give, provided you request permission in the comments. Many thanks!

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Psalmist, for expressing so beautifully the empty arms and for the children we were not able to bear. (sigh)

stinuksuk said...

Sorry, that was from me.

Anonymous said...

You are so full of love and God's Spirit that I find it very jarring to my soul to read this. I pray that God will answer your prayer and soothe this ache as only He is able. ((((Psalmist)))) love, Maureen

Anonymous said...

....so late in catching up with this. Beautiful. Precious. Thanks for articulating it.
Bless you.
Paisley

zorra said...

Amen. Thank you so much.

Anonymous said...

How you doin'? I've been self-absorbed here lately...God bless. Paisley

Psalmist said...

Thank you for your kind comments, everyone.

Maureen, please don't be concerned. This is one of the shadow parts of who I am. I'm feeling this most acutely now that I'm essentially past the potential for childbearing and still single. When my ex-husband abandoned me, he took with him the hope of ever having children, though it would have taken medical intervention. And as the years have gone by, every so often I've been keenly aware of that loss. I think that's why I love the children I work with so much. God is sufficent--more than sufficient--but understands and holds me when I miss my miscarried child, the mother who never mothered me, and the grandmother who did.

Thanks again for the feedback on the poem/prayer, everybody. It means a lot to me.

Suzie said...

my heart can not express with words how grateful i am for your heart felt expression, your words,touch my broken heart and made me feel less alone, Thanks